Have you ever felt at the end of your rope? You’ve tried everything. You don’t know what else to do. Maybe you stopped for a moment and said something like, “I need help. I need you. I need something.”
And you didn’t say it to anyone in particular. Just a call, out into the ethers. “Can anyone help?”
Sometimes it feels like failing. Because you couldn’t do it on your own.
I’m hear to tell you…YOU WERE NEVER MEANT TO. You were absolutely never meant to do everything on your own.
Those moments of prayer or those feelings of giving up, they’re important. You’re recognizing that you don’t have what it takes to do and be everything. And that’s a good thing!
If you think about it, we live in a world – a universe – where everything is taken care of for us. The earth gives us absolutely everything. The air is made for us to breathe, the soil gives us food to eat, our body breathes and functions without any of our conscious involvement. The sun warms us (but not too much) the darkness gives us respite. I could go on endlessly.
So why do we put so much pressure on ourselves? I woke up today and the sun rose on its own. Life was in my body. I didn’t really do anything. The only thing my conscious mind did was…START THINKING.
I thought about getting out of bed, what I would have for breakfast, whether I wanted coffee, which errands to run first. I thought about whether my lover loved me back, which emails I needed to reply to, whether I should deep condition my hair today.
I didn’t give one thought to all that allows us to even have a life, to exist, to live on this planet.
We’re meant to be a bit…ya know…self-centered. We’re so self-centered that when things go wrong, when we can’t control things around us, we think that we have failed.
But what the hek were we controlling anyway?
That feeling of failure is defined, “Oh, I just realized I can’t control all aspects of my life from the perspective of singular focus. It takes more than the perspective I’m in right now to soothe or rectify this situation.“
I would call that clarity…genius even! Giving up is realizing the perspective through which you’re seeing things needs to be adjusted. Prayer is the action that follows that understanding. “I can’t do this alone and I know that I am not alone. I allow myself to open up to that which aids me and uplifts my situation.”
There is a breath of life that flows through all things, people, and endeavors. Life takes participation and surrender to be at peak satisfaction for us. Too much participation without surrender to the larger self, and we feel stuck, stifled, hopeless. Too much surrender and life lacks definition and purpose.
We are in an eternal interplay between polarities. So…give yourself a break. You’re doing it right. When you notice something isn’t working, YOU’RE RIGHT. Ask yourself, am I too involved or not involved enough? Do I need to focus more, or relax a bit more? And then just try it out. This is a place of experimentation and play.
When you say that prayer, “I need help, I need someone. I need you.” know that you are a genius. You know how this universe works even when you think that you don’t. We have the ability to shift perspective from singular focus to multitude focus. Here are the attributes of each:
Singular focus is very specifically oriented. It can drill down into great detail, vivid color, solid form. It helps us see the world as concrete. Objects and events have concrete relationships to each other. Here, we feel small but well-defined. We have well-defined boundaries and personality.
Multitude focus is softer. It says, ‘I am not a singular person seeking to have impact on a large world. I am a wave of person, composed of many parts. All of those parts that I am carry the wisdom I need, when I need it. I open up to that variety of wisdom and vision. I let the parts of myself awaken that are best suited for the situation at hand.’
When we pray we are intending to open ourselves up to More. To let in more vision, more consciousness. We say, ‘this single-minded perspective is no longer suitable right now. I open myself up to my multi-consciousness self. There I feel full, I feel strong and broad, I recognize that I am much more than my personality.’
Perhaps we could call this the ‘ego’. But there is nothing wrong with that ego self, that detail oriented, single-minded personality self. It’s all about recognizing when it’s not a helpful viewpoint “right now”.
The next time you whisper, “help” or “I need”, know that you are being heard. Of course you are. More than anything you are powerfully initiating an intention. You are a vast, powerful being. And it only takes an intention to provide aid for you, to change direction. Embrace your intention. “I intend to relax into the wave that is me. I am held by all that is and all my needs are heard and received. I open up to greater vision. I let myself by taken care of. I see the evidence of that, even in the smallest of things.”
Learn to be okay with the changing of perspectives. We aren’t set off trying to obtain a perfect life and then never change course again. We are practicing the mastery of human and earthly variety. Mastery of movement. Of listening to our impulses, knowing when to step forward and when to stay steady…and going against our own knowing sometimes too – just for the fun of it!
You are a wild creature. Fearless, bold, and free. You dive deep into all kinds of mess and sorrow and rebound again, because you know that you can. Deep down you know there is only well-being, and there’s nowhere that you can go where the source-of-you won’t catch you.