I feel as though I can’t exist in a reality where there isn’t creative and spiritual expression. That without those things, there is no air to breathe, no purpose in living. And when I look around my life or the world and I can’t see that expression, when everything looks full of lines and walls and boxes…a tightness grows within me.
It’s as though some part of me starts screaming and thrashing around. And another part of me considers complying with those lines and walls and rules. And the screaming grows louder.
I sit in witness of this internal battle and just listen. I listen to the parts of myself and what is of value to them. The part of me that craves freedom, the part that calls for stability, the part that feels small and fearful.
And I say, “I hear you.”
And I remember that life isn’t about running away. When something feels intolerable, it’s because you feel so passionately. There’s something that you would fight for with the entirety of your being. Evidenced by a willingness to give up everything if you can’t have that one thing.
If I could scream from every rooftop in the whole world how powerful of a stance this is, I would. I would scream, “Please don’t give up! Tell me what calls to you so unequivocally! We need you to hold that flame!”
If all those who felt Peace calling their hearts gave up, peace would fall. And if all those who hear poetry rustling in the trees plugged their ears…words would lose their magic.
I think of my friends who have so much passion inside and don’t understand where it belongs in this world. But it’s so important. Because that passion is asking you to bring something into the world. It’s saying, “Keep me alive. Speak my name. You are my bearer, you give me life.”
Poets keep poetry alive. Artists keep art alive. And without them, those things would die. Life would be lines and walls and boxes.
What’s more important than keeping alive the one thing you would die for?
When something feels the most impossible, that’s when you most need to come into harmony with your deepest longing. What do you hold the most true? What can’t your soul live without? And realize that you are the bearer and holder of that very thing. It is your charge. Yours to bring into the world, yours to nurture.
We fight so many of our battles in the physical world. We bring it all forward and try to hammer things into place. But the most sacred battles are quiet.
They whisper things like, “I love you. I don’t know why, but I need you to be here. You’re important. Life isn’t right without you. Sometimes I try to convince other people of how valuable you are, but they don’t listen.”
And your passion would respond, “But it’s enough that you love me. That you can feel me and my relevance. Keep quietly loving me and express it when it feels right. Keep holding me in your light and letting me flow through you. And that’s enough.”
Love isn’t contingent upon the object of your affection loving you back. Love is yours to feel and has nothing to do with anyone or anything else. It’s a wave of feeling that is meant to be felt, experienced. You don’t need to physically express it for it to be True or have value. Love is yours.
And in the same way, just be in love with that which calls you. It’s enough to love it, to feel its beauty. To express it when it feels right, but not to force it when it doesn’t. You have nothing to prove and no one to convince. Your call is to hold the torch of your calling. To give it breath through you, effortlessly.
When I close my eyes and I see All Things, I see streams everywhere. Streams of thought, of feeling, of light. And when attention flows into a stream, it Becomes.
So when I look with my eyes closed, I see the Peace Holders. Those who quietly believe in Peace. They keep that stream alive. And I see the Upliftment Holders. They quietly lend their attention to the upliftment of all people. And so that stream stays steady and available. So many streams, varying in intensity depending on who is focused where.
That’s why it’s so important to just quietly believe in what you value. And sometimes that expresses in a big way into the world, sometimes in smalls ways, and sometimes in ways you don’t understand. But it makes a difference where it matters most. It lights up that stream. It makes it bigger, it gives it life for all to experience.
Take a moment to tap into what matters most to you. At the very core of your being, what yells your name? Is it Freedom? Is it Love? Is it Independence or the Well-Being of all creatures? It is Fun and Lightheartedness?
Now imagine that concept, that Feeling Space, streaming into all existence. And because it matters to you, you are part of that stream, part of what makes that very thing Alive. Imagine all those who are there with you, lending part of their attention and love to that very concept. And how you all give it life together.
For every one person who seems to have done something incredible in the world, there is a vast and powerful stream of consciousness behind that person. A stream of Many that is flowing through them to give evidenced life of that value stream. For every One person that makes a difference in the world, millions have first added their attention to that very thing.
[Be mindful what value stream you are adding attention to.]
So when life feels like too much or you can’t see what you love most around you, or even the possibility of its existence…remember that YOU are the one giving it life.
Relax and let the world do what it’s doing. It isn’t proving anything to you. It’s not supposed to convince you of your own values. It gives you opportunities to Realize those values. And then gather your strength and focus and breathe those values into the world. Not to compel or convince anyone.
But to amplify what which you hold most high. To join others who share that same stream. To imagine it resonating throughout the whole world so that your love is available to anyone who seeks Upliftment or Fun or Freedom.
When things feel intolerable it means: I’m asking the world to prove to me that which I actually intend to bring to life myself. I’m asking the world to speak to me that which I mean to speak. I’m asking the world to express that which I most want to express.
So, cut out the middle man. Say, “I can’t see what I want to see…so I’ll be the evidence of it. Quietly, and sometimes not so quietly. This is no problem because, nothing is set in stone – even if it appears to be. Whatever I lend my attention to will amplify, this is for sure. I’m not fighting, I’m just lending my attention. I’m acting as I feel inspired to act. I’m not forcing, I’m allowing something important to Become. To grow and be nurtured by me, as best I can. There is no timeline, no rush. Only a joyful expression of love. A light inside me that shines towards What Matters Most.”