There exists a word somewhere that I can’t yet find.
It’s something like bravery, something like strength, something like focus.
It’s persistent and tenacious, it’s holding your breath under water as long as you can.
What’s the word?
When you’re about to go on stage for the first time, needing to remember your lines.
When you open the restaurant door, prepared to meet your date for the first time.
Standing on a high diving platform, readying yourself for the jump.
It’s an assembling of energy and focus. A gathering of focused attention. And this takes something, a bravery or strength.
This is the feeling of seeing your life as it is, and internally holding to a different vision.
It’s being mocked and feeling hurt, but remaining loyal to an inner vision where you are loved and respected.
That kind of “dual vision” is an art as much as it is a training. It’s stretching, it’s strength, it’s endurance.
I remember a walk at my favorite park when I was thinking of the reality of my current life. I remembered how I disliked certain things.
I thought of how disgruntled I was; I found it difficult to keep my thoughts in a helpful vibration.
I envisioned where I wanted to be, how I wanted to feel, and it felt impossible. “It’s too far away. I can’t get there.”
But every day I tried. I would imagine, and take a deep breath, and practice that vibration for however long I could.
It felt like my current perception of my reality kept trying to suck me back in. So there I was, standing in the park, wrestling two worlds.
As though I was standing with my arms outstretched, one hand holding my current reality, while my other hand held the new.
I felt the pull of the old, and with this undefined Word, I rose through the pull and shifted my focus to the new.
It took something, something like effort or strength. But a different kind of effort. A force that we don’t speak about.
I felt stretched between 2 worlds, somewhere in between and also in both. I turned to the new and saw it with a different kind of vision. One that was determined and sure and strong.
I stayed in this suspended state as long as I could, practicing. Feeling the pull of the old, but rising through it. Stretching for the new and steadying into that vibration, into that vision.
It felt like I was holding my breath or balancing on a shaky tight rope. At any moment, I would have to let go. But I just needed to focus and stay steady for as long as I could.
And every time I did this, my new vision would come to life. It would happen fairly quickly.
How long can you stay steady in the vibration of where you want to be, while still lovingly tending to where you are?
It’s an art and a practice in an unspoken force.
There is something inside of us, or that travels with us, that allows us this practice. The ability to observe and live in two worlds. To stand in one and stretch towards the other.
Have you experienced this “force”? How would you describe it?
Can we become better focusers, more adept at stretching into desired reality?
Comment your thoughts below.
<3,
Heba
Love: 