I used to want to help too much. I didn’t realize it was a problem. I didn’t know that kind of thing could be a problem.
It was what I learned in relationships.
Love is invasive. Love tries to fix you.
I didn’t know that Love was actually free. Love let’s you “fix” yourself.
I started healing from this in 2015, with significant stints of very tough inner work.
And here I am, trying to Love in a way that feels better.
I am naturally an uplifter. It’s what I’ve always loved, cheering people on, seeing the best in everyone. This was the Light side of my Shadow.
There was a reason I was that way, so intensely tuned to people’s “best”. It was because I couldn’t accept the worst.
I wholeheartedly believe that the difficulty that makes you “the way you are” creates a huge liability, but also the greatest gifts.
It is a burden and a blessing.
It’s in these extremes that people find their own individual superpowers. When you know the darkest and lightest of something, it’s yours. Your burden and your blessing, you know that thing inside and out, and it knows you.
There is nothing more terrifying than the shadow of your superpower coming to light.
It comes trotting in, trying to tell you about its genesis.
It says that out of immense pressure, something was born. A diamond within.
And when the shadow appears, it’s time to reclaim yourself. It’s time to reclaim your story.
It says, see the whole story. Claim yourself.
Out of ugliness, something beautiful was born. And so, both exist within you.
As you accept and claim the ugly within (which you realize isn’t ugly at all), you fully step into your power.
What does it mean to step into your power?
I’ll tell you exactly.
It’s when you accept the whole range of your superpowers. From their conception in the dark, to their highest expression.
In accepting the range, you’re able to operate those powers with more awareness and more wisdom.
Knowing the whole of something means you can see it as part of you, rather than it consuming you.
You take the reins back on those parts of you that activated without conscious choice, and so you’re able to weild your power with full vision and understanding.
Eckhart Tolle said that all spiritual teachings attempt to point you in a direction. They point at something that can not be conceptualized in its entirety.
I find that same logic in how we help each other. We point in the direction of truth or light or hope. We fully understand that everyone has to walk their own path.
There is a thread that runs through all of us. It’s where we connect to hope, clarity, and our own reasoning for “best”.
Love points at that thread. It knows that everyone has to connect to their own inner voice. Everyone has to find their thread.
When someone is in great turmoil, it’s when we most want to help save them. I’ve come to understand how important it is that everyone finds their thread under all circumstances. In bitter hell and in sweet bliss.
In fact, it’s of utmost importance that we can all find it in the chaos. That thing that soothes us, that sparks revelation and revolution from the inside out.
Now, when I want to help someone, I remember with them the light inside. That their inner wisdom is speaking to them in the most perfect way. I remember the light within us all, and I let that dictate my actions and my words.
Today, I invite you to remember a time when you connected with the soothing knowing within. When a calm came over you in the midst of chaos and you thought, “I can do this”. Think of someone you know who is struggling, and imagine them finding that clarity. It is theirs to find, but you can imagine with them in your heart.
With love,
Heba
Love: 